Questions

You know how sometimes you have those nights where everything's going fine, you're watching television. You're eating a bowl of popcorn after a decent day that you can't complain about. It was a good day. You don't have anything out of the usual planned, so there's nothing major on your mind.

Then BAM, out of the blue you start thinking about your future. You start questioning what you thought you knew about yourself and all the options you have. That happened to me last night and it smacked me upside the head.

Somehow I started thinking about where I'll go after college. I have a pretty decent internship, but do I want to stay in Columbia, South Carolina? I think that's one thing I'm sure of - I definitely want to get out, regardless of where I go.

I could go to New York City. I'm a marketing student, and if I'm interested in working for the big dogs, that's where I'd need to go. I love London, so I could move there too if I were able to get a job. Or maybe Charleston? It's the prettiest town in the south in my opinion.

There are lots of little decisions I need to make soon that feel like weights on my shoulders. I want a dog - do I get one and risk trekking a dog into an apartment versus giving them a backyard? If my (not so reliable) car fails, do I invest in one I'll have for a few years, or make due until I figure out if a big city is in my future? 

I feel like there are two sides of me: there's one side that would be perfectly fine staying in the south. I could move to Charleston, or even Savannah so I could be near the coast. I could live downtown and I could have a dog. I'd be relatively close to home, so I could visit my family. The weather would be nice all year. I could have a car. I'd be surrounded by monograms and southern familiarity. Maybe I'd meet a nice southern boy.

Then there's the other side. The one that wants to work for a big company and have a tiny apartment in a big city. The one that likes taking the subway and shopping at little stores or boutiques instead of giant Targets and malls. The side that likes to try out funky clothes and be a little different. I could meet people from all over the US, maybe all over the world. I could go to shows and concerts whenever I want because there would always be things happening.

So what side do I choose? Where do I go? Who do I want to be?
These are the questions I ask the internet. Does anyone feel the same?

#rant